Bleeding after Sex: Why it Happens & What to Do Next

Let’s set the scene: you have just finished up with a passionate partner, or maybe you concluded a steamy self-love session when you notice blood. What should you do? 

First and foremost, do some immediate self-care to ensure that there is no continuous/ongoing heavy bleeding or injury – you may enlist a partner to take a peek and make sure you aren’t missing anything. If there is blood in the area, clean yourself up with mild fragrance-free soap and warm water or with a product like Good Clean Love’s Balance Moisturizing Wash.

Second, the Women’s Health experts at Cleveland Clinic say that when it comes to post-coital bleeding (bleeding after sex), “Most of the time, it’s nothing major,” however, “bleeding after sex can sometimes signal a larger problem.” Before you jump to the worst possible conclusion, here are a few of the common causes of post-coital bleeding.

1. Menstruation

While you might feel like this is self-explanatory and recognizable, you can always double-check your period calculations to see where you are in your cycle. Remember that you may be experiencing breakthrough bleeding (spotting between cycles), and that spotting during ovulation is also common. Alternatively, if you have a long-term contraceptive method (like an IUD or Nexplanon, the arm implant), you might get an irregular period or random spotting. 

If you have concerns about abnormal bleeding during your cycle, see your healthcare provider (HCP) and they may counsel you on certain methods of regulating menstrual cycles, like oral contraception. 

2. Irritation or Trauma

Vaginal atrophy and vaginal dryness are annoying and frequent culprits of vaginal irritation following sex, especially intercourse. If it feels like a desert down there, know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you and it has no reflection on how aroused you are or how attracted you are to a partner. Dryness is frequently a product of low levels of estrogen – estrogen levels tend to be low, for example, after menopause, following childbirth, throughout cancer treatment, while breastfeeding, etc. Natural lubrication is also affected by oral contraception, where you are in your menstrual cycle, some antihistamines (allergy medicine), some antidepressants, and other underlying health conditions.

Having sex without sufficient lubrication can lead to friction (think rug burn… in your vagina), and microtears of the vaginal tissue. Also, if you have experienced physical trauma, like an injury, sex may be irritating or inflaming the injury/trauma, which could cause bleeding. 

Irritation and trauma take time to heal but can be aided by certain lubricants and moisturizers – some of which you can get over the counter, some of which you can get from your HCP. The best way to prevent irritation is to use the appropriate lubricant during sexual activity, especially during intercourse. 

3. Hymen disturbance 

Whether or not you have had sex (especially penetrative sex) before, parts of your hymen may still be intact, and when disturbed, it can cause bleeding. The hymen is very misunderstood – it is a thin piece of tissue at the vaginal opening that stretches to accommodate tampons or penetration – think of it as like a scrunchie just inside the vaginal opening. While hymen disturbance/tearing/stretching may cause mild pain and bleeding, there is no need to be concerned, unless you have ongoing pain, discomfort, or bleeding.

Fact or Fiction: Hymen Edition

In our society, especially when we are growing up, we are often taught to equate an ‘intact’ hymen with virginity  First, let’s address the idea of ‘virginity.’ Virginity is a social construction (deeply founded in religion) that has no root in biology or physiology – this means that, in a sense, virginity isn’t real. It cannot be proven or shown and any attempts to do so are misled endeavors to draw “conclusions about women’s and girls’ sexual history…based on assumptions about… a small membranous tissue with no known biological function, which typically occupies a portion of the external vaginal opening in females.” 

There are long-standing socio-cultural practices of ‘virginity testing’ when in reality, experts in the field have come forth and said “Hymen is not an accurate indication of virginity.” A wide misconception is that the hymen covers the whole vaginal opening – if this is the case, it is called an imperforate hymen and it actually requires medical attention. This is rare and only happens in about 0.1% of newborn females. It is actually not abnormal for babies to be born without a hymen at all and many people’s hymen are “broken accidentally by tampon use or vigorous exercise.”

If you’re thinking that ‘virginity testing’ rings a bell, but not because of religion, you may remember a few years ago in 2019, rapper T.I. came out on a podcast and admitted to bringing his daughter annually to the gynecologist to check to see if her hymen was still intact. Not only is this a violation of his daughter’s right to privacy and autonomy, but it’s entirely pointless – you cannot prove whether or not someone has had sex by looking at their hymen.